Although many parents seem to believe that if they don’t teach their young children to be responsible early in life, they will turn out to be irresponsible teens or adults, it is important to remember that it takes time for kids to learn and good habits are not created overnight. Parents can start teaching responsibility early on, but the lessons won’t produce many positive results until their children are old enough to understand the meaning of responsibility. A two-year-old is not developmentally ready to learn responsibility, and parental frustration is the likely result of expecting toddlers to exhibit perfect behavior and responsibility.
Instead, it is better to remember that children learn responsibility one step at a time and that takes time and experience. Parents can teach infant children what they want them to learn as long as they realize there will be no quick results. Learning, testing and experimenting are all important parts of the developmental process. If young children aren’t allowed to learn who they are in a safe and sensible environment, they may act out with rebellion when they become teenagers. Parental permissiveness is not the only alternative to controlling young children. Better to be both clear and firm when attempting to teach responsibility.
Teaching Young Children Responsibility:
• Don’t expect immediate cooperation, it takes time to learn good
habits.
• Don’t expect children under the age of six to understand your
priorities.
• Don’t tell toddlers what to do when you can ask them to do something
instead. A friendly question can make children feel capable and more inclined to cooperate than a direct order would.
• Don’t nag children under the age of six. Gentle reminders will work
much better, especially if you and your child have made prior agreements about particular behaviors.
• Don’t make threats, offer choices instead, and be sure to
follow-through with any decisions you make together.
• Do involve young children in problem-solving process as they will be
more likely to follow through with solutions they have helped create.